One day, Bob the seagull was minding his own business, trying to steal people's food. He didn’t understand why humans would swat him away when he was near, he just wanted food! Every day he would return to his family with not a chip or a fry. They had had to go to sleep hungry for the past few nights. He was angry and confused. Humans allowed other humans to share food with him, yet a seagull was shunned? Rude. He was determined to feed his family by venturing into the most dangerous place a seagull could be -- a human's nest. Their nests were on the ground and not on a tree, which was weird, so far from the sky! Not that he had ever seen a flying human. He set out in the early morning, having a map planned out in his head.

     First he would have to get in through the wooden barrier. That would be easy though, because it was low enough to fly over. The hard part would be getting past the guards.

     The four-legged beasts could jump surprisingly high, and their loud barks could damage a seagull's hearing. Their fur-covered legs had sharp talons at the ends, made for killing seagulls. And their stinky breath could make him faint. Once he got past them he would have to rip a hole in a door. Their doors were flimsy, made out of black netting. It was a mystery to Bob why they didn’t use the glass reinforcements their nest provided to protect the netting.

     Next, he would have to sneak over to where the food storage was and grab everything in sight. The humans would notice him soon otherwise. Number one seagull rule: quantity over quality. Then he would have to escape as fast as possible since the food would hold him down and make him an easy target. He preened his feathers once more and let out a battle cry.

     He located his target and brought his wings in, jumping off the branch and diving towards the nest. He streaked down through the sky like a missile, wearing his battle-face. He could not fail this mission, because he could not show humans that they had won! He landed on a grassy plain in front of the den, sporting a bed of flowers. He sneezed. Darn daffodils, always tickling his nose. He hopped stealthily to the wooden barrier, checking his surroundings for danger. Silence met his ears, good.

     He carried through with the plan, giggling as he soared past the sleeping guards. Such slackers, he thought. Making a hole was easy enough, but as his slim body wiggled through, a wing was caught in the netting. He cursed and tried to yank it out. Nope. The guards could awaken any second, he had to get out quickly! He chomped down on the netting with his beak, hoping that a bigger hole would solve the problem. It did, a few feathers still caught in the door but body intact. His claws click-clacked and left white marks against the wooden floor.      He quickly found the food storage and grabbed the bag of chips in his beak. His feet reached for a bag of bread and a container with blueberries. He flapped his wings but his heavy luggage slowed him down. He made it out of the den, one wobbly flap at a time. A couple more feathers were left in the netting but he survived.

     Now the next problems. The guards and the barrier. He regretted not getting a helper. Oh well, he would have to do this himself.

Somehow. The bread was getting smashed under him and the blueberries had turned into half juice. Perhaps, he could take them out one at a time. He took the bag of chips over the barrier, then the bread, and then the blueberries, and finally all three foods were over. He flew them back to his nest using the same one-by one-technique. His family screeched in joy and they feasted like royals. Moral: Seagulls always get their way.